Video Voyeur Update:


May 5, 2003

Klarides Praises Video Voyeur Arrest in Colchester
New Law That Representative Spearheaded Used to Charge Suspect

HARTFORD- State Representative Themis Klarides today praised the arrest in Colchester of a man under her landmark video voyeurism law, which was put into effect in 1999. Representative Klarides led the effort in the Connecticut General Assembly to pass the legislation, which made it a crime to videotape or photograph anyone who ought to have a reasonable expectation of privacy, for the purpose of sexual gratification or malicious intent. It makes video voyeurism a Class A misdemeanor, punishable by up to a year in prison. Distribution of the material is a felony, which can get the perpetrator five years in prison.

Ronald Lamontagne, a 43-year-old former Connecticut resident who now resides in Worcester, Massachusetts, has been arrested under the new video voyeurism statute for videotaping several women during private moments. Mr. Lamontagne allegedly distributed a number of copies of the footage worldwide, without the knowledge or consent of the women taped. He is charged with two counts of voyeurism, and twenty counts of disseminating voyeuristic material via the Internet.

“This is precisely the kind of criminal act my initial legislation was aimed at combating,” said Representative Klarides. “In this case, there is not only an allegation of voyeurism, but of disseminating the material in video form to people throughout the country, and in other countries. It is certainly criminal to violate someone’s privacy through the act of voyeurism, but actually taping and distributing the footage compounds the violation against the victims in this case. Now, by simply popping a tape in a VCR, these victims are having their right to privacy violated again and again.”

Klarides noted that because of Connecticut’s stronger voyeurism laws, the penalty for the suspect would be substantially stronger than if he had been arrested in neighboring states. She pointed to a recent case in Long Island where a voyeur had installed a camera in the smoke detector of his tenant to observe and video tape her in private moments. The offender in this case received a fine as a penalty for trespass.

Representative Klarides also referred to new legislation that she has introduced this session, which raises the penalty of voyeurism from a class A misdemeanor, and would make the act of voyeurism a class D felony, just as the act of distributing voyeuristic material is.

“Connecticut is ahead of the curve compared to other states,” said Klarides. “ Rhode Island and New York have only recently taken steps to strengthen their laws against this sort of offense, and they do not yet have adequate legal penalties for these offenses. There is a great deal of satisfaction on my part to know that such an offender, if proven guilty, will now face very substantial criminal penalties more equal to the offense.”

Lamontagne is being held on a $15,000 bond and awaits arraignment in Norwich Superior Court.

Just a quick blurb to let everyone know the Annual CT Space & Aviation Day was a HUGE success!!!! Estimated attendance was 10,000 people --- FANTASTIC!!!!! I was working a slow venue at the Fire Academy (everyone wanted to see the jets) and still managed to $200+ in T-shirt sales. If you managed to join us for the day, THANK YOU for making it a success. If you didn't join us -- you had better be there next year!!

REMINDER

Come visit me at the Annual CT Space & Aviation Day!!! It promises to be a fun-fille day for adults & children and for a great cause. All proceeds go the the Hole in the Wall Gang Camp.

SPACE & AVIATION DAY
AT BRADLEY INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT

A BENEFIT FOR THE HOLE IN THE WALL GANG CAMP
SATURDAY, JUNE 28, 2003 10:00 AM – 2:00 PM
CELEBRATING AND SALUTING OUR HEROES

· Iraqi Freedom Fighters of the 103rd Airborne Division, CT Air National Guard
· Connecticut’s Memorial to Fallen Firefighters, CT Fire Academy
· 58th Bomb Wing Memorial, New England Air Museum

All venues open at 10:00 AM
Starting Location: CT Air National Guard Base

Tethered Hot Air Balloon Rides – Lego Building Competition – Big Inflatable Game
Refreshments - Free Parking - Free Admission

Donations Accepted

SCHEDULE FOR THE DAY

· CONNECTICUT AIR NATIONAL GUARD – Come and see close up a variety of military aircraft.

· CONNECTICUT STATE POLICE – Learn about dive and SWAT teams, DARE, Children’s ID Units, Major Crime Van, Canine Unit, Explosive Disposal Unit and the Aviation Unit.

· NEW ENGLAND AIR MUSEUM – See exhibits and presentations in Celebration of the Centennial of the Airplane. Explore vintage aircraft, including the recently restored B-29 at the new 58th Bomb Wing Memorial.

· CONNECTICUT FIRE ACADEMY – Live Fire Demonstrations at 11:00 AM and 1:00 PM. Kid’s Fire Safety House, Vehicle Extrication Demonstrations and Flashy the robotic Fire Dog.

Since 1988, The Hole in the Wall Gang Camp has been fortunate to have the support of thousands of people. Each summer the camp provides love, hope and joy to over 900 children who are seriously ill with cancer, sickle cell anemia, HIV/AIDS, and other blood diseases. The Hole in the Wall Gang Camp also provides year-round programs for hundreds of children and their families – Free of Charge.


Directions from I-91

Take exit 40 (Bradley International Airport)
Take East Granby exit (RT 20)
Go right at the first light onto Bradley Park R.
Go right onto Nicholson Rd. to CT Air Guard
Go left at Air Guard onto Perimeter Rd.
At stop sign continue straight
Air Museum and Fire Academy will be on the left.

Shuttle buses run from parking areas to all venues

Main Parking Areas:
· New England Air Museum
· CT Fire Academy
· AGI Cargo Facility

Alternate Parking Areas: (on Bradley Park Rd.)
· Old Gas Turbine Building
· Eagle Global Logistics
· REM Sales

1. How are you planning to spend the summer [winter]?
Unless circumstances change drastically (winning Powerball jackpot) I’ll be spending my time doing boring things, like looking for a job and working. I had plans for a cruise in November but had to cancel since I’m currently out of a job.

2. What was your first summer job?
Like most girls my first summer job was babysitting. I have two younger brothers and both of my parents worked. The first summer, I had 4 kids to watch, my brothers (ages 9 and 4) and friends son about age 9 and a 6 month old infant. If my memory is accurate, I was making $80/wk, not bad for only being 15 years old.

3. If you could go anywhere this summer [winter], where would you go?
I would go where ever a cruise ship can take me! Caribbean in the winter, Alaska in the summer, up the Mississippi on a Riverboat, around the Mediterranean and Aegean Seas….

4. What was your worst vacation ever?
That would have to be the year my ex-husband and I rented a cabin at a campground in Damariscotta, Maine. First, rarely is there a “heat wave” in Maine but we had it that week!! The temps were in the 90’s, high humidity and no a/c in the cabin. Both of us spent a couple of days being ill because of the heat. We specifically asked for a cabin away from most of the campers because we enjoyed “quiet” surroundings. Where did they put us?!?! In the middle of a family reunion campout!!! One morning we woke only to find the outside of our cabin was covered with bees! Not too bad except that both my ex and I are allergic to bee stings. We had to wait for the bees to clear out before we could leave the cabin that morning.

5. What was your best vacation ever?
Tough choice it actually comes down to two vacations, both lasting for two weeks. The first was about 1981 and I went to Seattle, WA for two weeks with my roommate. She was from Seattle and had a lawsuit pending there. When she won her case, my trip became a “freebie”. Seattle is a beautiful city and very clean. I was even impressed with areas they considered “slums”. The Japanese influence is clearly seen in the gardens of Seattle. Wisteria, Rhododendrons, Azaleas abound and all nicely trimmed. The city itself is surrounded by snow capped mountains and Puget Sound. I spent a day wandering around the dock area of Seattle. In my wanderings, I found a little shop called “Ye Olde Curiosity Shoppe”. It was literally packed with curious items – mummy, two-headed pig and all sorts of really cool items! The shop itself couldn’t have been larger than 20’ x 30’ and I spent several hours in there just looking around. We spent a day driving into the mountains, visited Shilshoe (sp?) it’s the largest marina in the US, Arboretum, Science Museum and just had a fabulous time while I was there.

The second vacation was last November when I did “back to back” cruises. Nothing like 18 days of cruise ship fun to get in some serious R&R!!

3. What about politically? Is it reasonable to allow a woman to plead insanity due to PMDD or hormonal imbalances?

There is a rather lengthy discussion attempting to take place on Victoria’s Blog in the “Comments” area. Comments just don’t allow enough room to voice what I feel the need to say. Therefore, I’m explaining my reasoning for the answer to the above question.


“As many as 90% of all women will have to deal with the aches, pains and emotional stress of Premenstrual Syndrome or PMS at some time during their reproductive years while 30% to 40% of all women will have symptoms distressing enough to interfere with their everyday lives. Some of the symptoms of premenstrual syndrome include abdominal bloating, acne, anxiety, backache, breast swelling and tenderness, cramps, depression, food cravings, fainting spells, fatigue, headaches, insomnia, altered sex drive, swelling of the fingers and ankles, and personality changes such as drastic mood swings, outbursts of anger, violence, and thoughts of suicide.”
“Premenstrual Syndrome is a reoccurring condition that affects women during the one to two weeks before menstruation begins (the luteal phase) and disappears at the end of a full flow of menses.”

“Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) is a severe form of PMS that affects 3% to 8% of all women. To diagnosis this disease a woman must suffer from at least five symptoms of depression listed below:
· Feelings of sadness or hopelessness,
· Possible suicidal thoughts,
· Tension or anxiety,
· Mood swings marked by periods of teariness,
· Persistent irritability or anger that affects other people,
· Disinterest in daily activities and relationships,
· Trouble concentrating,
· Fatigue or low energy,
· Food cravings or bingeing,
· Sleep disturbances,
· Feeling out of control
· Unordinary physical symptoms during the majority of her periods and must become worse a week or so before the period begins and disappear shortly after the period ends.

To diagnosis Premenstrual Syndrome and to rule out the possibility of a mood disorder or another disease with similar symptoms there must be at least a week during the first part of the menstrual cycle that is symptom free. To determine this, your doctor will probably ask you to keep track of when your symptoms occur. “

The above information was taken from Healing With Nutrition web site.

Many people believe PMS/PMDD to be an “excuse” for inappropriate behavior. While I have know MANY women to use PMS/PMDD as an excuse, I also know from first hand experience that it’s VERY real. Just like with any other disease how can you determine who will suffer from PMS/PMDD. Plain and simple, you can’t determine. Should the possibility of PMS/PMDD keep all women out of decision making/power positions – hell no! Only 40% of the female will have symptoms severe enough to interfere with daily routines. Of the 40% of women, only 3% - 8% would be classified as severe PMS or PMDD as the medical field now calls it.

I was diagnosed with PMDD after MONTHS (close to a year) of thinking I was stressed out, over worked or worse, losing my mind. Not once did I ever associate it with being PMDD. Most women know about the bloating, food cravings, irritability as symptoms. The other symptoms are not discussed, never told to us and therefore it goes undetected. According to my physician, at that time, women had previously been locked in institutions because they were “crazy”.

Based on my experience with PMDD, I would not have trusted myself in any position of authority! I have “bolded” all the symptoms I had for a 2 – 2.5 week period EVERY MONTH for almost a year before I knew what was happening to my body. I could hear words come out of my mouth and not want to believe I was actually saying those things. Emotions were rampant, one day in particular a co-worker stopped by my desk to say “good-morning”. We had a nice cheery conversation and he left. Another co-worker came up about 10 minutes later to say “good morning”. Aside from the fact that I was crying my eyes out, I also told him to “fuck off.” I knew I was doing this, I even felt sorry for all my co-workers (department of 15 people – all men!) but I had no control over what I said and did. NONE! People that know me also know I would NEVER say anything even remotely close to that, while at work. There were many nights, I fought urges to sail my car off the closest bridge. I didn’t want to drive anywhere out of fear that I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from acting upon that urge.

How can any woman determine what is going on with her body, when she doesn’t know the symptoms? Yet women are the only ones capable of making the diagnosis. Women need to be educated in the symptoms, not told they are crazy and locked up. Once it’s determined the problem is PMS/PMDD, there IS treatment but you can’t treat yourself for PMDD. At the PMS stage, there is vitamin therapy, diet/exercise therapy and hormone therapy. At the PMDD stage, you can chose hormone therapy or MAO inhibitors such as Prozac.

Now as for using PMS/PMDD as a valid defense, I still say YES. When you read the statistics. It would only be a valid defense for MAYBE 5% of the female population. There would be signs leading up to “whatever” that can be verified and testified to. If PMS/PMDD were not allowed as a defense, in essence, women would be denying that it happens and we go back to the days of being called “crazy” and institutionalized. It is a valid medical disorder caused within the female reproductive system. Denying what happens to our bodies is denying your gender. Men can’t have PMS/PMDD only women. Then again, women don’t have prostate problems and men do. There are physical differences in our bodies that we must accept and deal with. Not condemn each other for those differences.

WE HAVE BRAINS topic:

I'm always curious about others' perspectives on menstruation & menopause, since these continue to run the gamut from curse to miracle of nature. It makes for interesting discussion.
So, a few questions to get us started (as always with my topics, feel free to wander off in another direction):

1. How (if at all) do you think about your own or other's menstrual cycles? Is it horrid? A minor inconvenience? Something to celebrate?
How I think of them depends upon how sexually active I’ve been the previous month J Inconvenient, if I had plans for those days. Celebrate if I been active and not cautious the previous month. While I was married, it was depressing simply because it was a constant reminder of a child I wanted and wasn’t carrying.

2. Medically, are we over- or under-sensitive to the changes of monthly cycles and to menopause?

Definitely under-sensitive to the hormonal changes in the female body!! Medically it’s getting better but still a long way to go. Many physicians and people (male & female) don’t believe in PMS/PMDD, simply because they haven’t experienced it. Even I had discounted the extreme cases of PMS until I experienced them first hand. For many months, my emotions ran to extremes for 2 weeks and I had no idea why. When I say extremes, I’m talking one minute I would be happy and chatting away. Five minutes later, I would be crying and have thoughts of suicide. I would literally feel every emotion at least twice per day and each to a dramatic extreme. One night I happened to catch a news blurb about PMS and the women was telling exactly how I had been feeling for months. At that point I kept a journal of when the emotions would start to change. Sure enough, it was always in the 2 weeks prior to my period.

Once I realized my problem was PMS, I went to my physician and spoke with him about treatment. I was very fortunate to have an older male physician that accepted and knew about PMS. He explained women, at one time, had been institutionalized because of PMS. That statement alone brought me to tears – I wasn’t losing my mind after all!!! Even though he could never experience the problem, he was very understanding and helpful.

3. What about politically? Is it reasonable to allow a woman to plead insanity due to PMDD or hormonal imbalances?
Having experienced it first hand – DEFINITELY!! I could hear myself say things and do things so out of character but had no control over myself. As an example my immediate supervisor (male) had asked why I hadn’t done a certain job yet. My blatant response was “Because I was too fucking busy doing your job.” That comment landed me on 2nd shift, his alternative was to fire me. However, having worked with/for him for about 10 years at the time, he knew something was wrong. He knew I would never speak to another person like that. I couldn’t believe those words actually came out of my mouth! I’m not certain I would classify the defense as being “insanity” simply because it’s not a mental defect. PMS/PMDD is a chemical imbalance in the brain caused by a physical/hormonal imbalance.

I’m now getting to an age where “Peri-menopause” is starting. Right now it’s only infrequent hot flashes, night sweats, and missed periods. I don’t know what may or may not happen with hormonal changes within my body but I’m certain to find out first hand!

4. And for those of you who currently menstruate - do your political leanings play a role in your ideas about period (for instance, do you use non-corporate, non-disposable pads, or allocate that time for specific types of action)?
Why would I use non-disposable pads? I hate doing laundry!!! I only use pads when I have cramps. Something in the pads, makes me break out in a rash. If you think having your period is bad, try having a rash at the same time!!! The only problem I have with tampons is they seem to make my cramps worse. It could be my imagination, I really don’t know.

Last night's Poetry Peep Show was a success!! Fun, tom foolery and great time was had by all - cast and audience alike. We should all write to Faith & Hendree to have the Peepshow appear around the state - maybe even at the CT Poetry Festival.

The Friday Five:

1. Is your hair naturally curly, wavy, or straight? Long or short?
Thick, wavy and short

2. How has your hair changed over your lifetime?
Besides getting grey? Well I've had it short, long, permed, wavy, middle part, side part, no part, brunette, blonde, red/auburn --- should I continue?!?!?

3. How do your normally wear your hair?
I can't be bothered with styling my hair. My hair frizzes a lot so I don't use a blow dryer unless it's absolutely necessary. Since it has a natural wave, it curls and stays in place simply by combing it into place. I very simply wash, finger/comb style and go.

4. If you could change your hair this minute, what would it look like?
I haven't a clue. I change it so often and it's usually a matter of telling my hairdresser - do whatever you want. Jayneanne has been my hairdresser for about 10 years. She knows exactly what I will like for a cut/style/color.

5. Ever had a hair disaster? What happened?
Thankfully only one disaster and I did a lot of screaming at the salon when they couldn’t repair it until after I returned from a wedding in Maine. Many years ago, I had gone to a salon for a perm. I had been there before but this time I was scheduled with someone new. My hair looked great when I left the salon however, for some perms, you can’t wash your hair for 3 days. Well, the first time I washed my hair is when I started screaming. I had gotten a “curly” perm, half of my head was really curly and the other half was completely straight!!! When I called the salon, they insisted I must have washed my hair before the 3 day period was over, therefore it was my own fault. After a lot of arguing, they finally relented to re-perm my hair at no charge. However, it couldn’t be done for two weeks because of the chemicals involved. I made the best of my hair during my vacation and the wedding but had it re-permed as soon as possible. Finally it was time to have my hair done again, this time with yet another person. She insisted upon using a stronger chemical claiming the other perm wasn’t the right one for my hair. She ended up burning my scalp and the ends of my hair. I ended up with a full refund and major damage to my hair.

I'm baaaaaaaaack and sitting here amazed at the wonders of modern technology. While writing my blog, I'm also chatting with my cousin, Nita, in Alaska. She's giving me a tour of her home, via webcam. Of course, now she wants to know why I don't have a webcam!!! She tried to show me her yard but it's too sunny outside for me to see it. There's a major glare off the window.

Now that I'm back home full time, I need to get back into my routine. Starting tomorrow, I'll be back at J&G's for my Friday Happy Hour. After all my barstool is getting cold!!!

On saturday, I am planning on attend the "Poetry Peep Show"
Saturday, June 21st, Circa Bistro, 92 Bank Street, Waterbury, 2nd Floor
POETRY PEEP SHOW - 8 p.m.

Shine those boots and throw on the leather. The Poetry Peep Show is goin to be this year's kinkiest poetry reading. In the tradition of the bawdy French fabliaux or the naughty limerick, the poets performing will take you with a wink and a nudge to a less wholesome side of poetry. There will be big laughs for everyone. The show is a fundraiser for The 2003 Connecticut Poetry Festival so bring your dollars, bring your camera (there will probably be some goo blackmail material), and bring your erotic poems for the poetry open mike that follows the performance. Poets featured in the show include: Roger Ochs, Faith Vicinanza, John Jeffrey, Alice-Anne Bridgers, Peter Bridgers, Kerri Provost, Zork, Mark Lee, Christina E. Arroyo, and the master mind behind this event, Hendree Milward. For driving directions, go to Circa Bistro or call 203.597.9292. For information about The 2003 CT Poetry Festival, go to CT Poetry Festival.


There is no better place to be Saturday night. Erotic poetry through the ages, a littel e.e. cummings, a little John Jeffrey, a little classical poetry, a little futuristic, mostly in good fun, lots of costuming, lots of laughs, and for a good cause.

Come and join us for lots of fun!! See you there!!!

Come visit me at the Annual CT Space & Aviation Day!!! It promises to be a fun-fille day for adults & children and for a great cause. All proceeds go the the Hole in the Wall Gang Camp.

SPACE & AVIATION DAY
AT BRADLEY INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT

A BENEFIT FOR THE HOLE IN THE WALL GANG CAMP
SATURDAY, JUNE 28, 2003 10:00 AM – 2:00 PM
CELEBRATING AND SALUTING OUR HEROES

· Iraqi Freedom Fighters of the 103rd Airborne Division, CT Air National Guard
· Connecticut’s Memorial to Fallen Firefighters, CT Fire Academy
· 58th Bomb Wing Memorial, New England Air Museum

All venues open at 10:00 AM
Starting Location: CT Air National Guard Base

Tethered Hot Air Balloon Rides – Lego Building Competition – Big Inflatable Game
Refreshments - Free Parking - Free Admission

Donations Accepted

SCHEDULE FOR THE DAY

· CONNECTICUT AIR NATIONAL GUARD – Come and see close up a variety of military aircraft.

· CONNECTICUT STATE POLICE – Learn about dive and SWAT teams, DARE, Children’s ID Units, Major Crime Van, Canine Unit, Explosive Disposal Unit and the Aviation Unit.

· NEW ENGLAND AIR MUSEUM – See exhibits and presentations in Celebration of the Centennial of the Airplane. Explore vintage aircraft, including the recently restored B-29 at the new 58th Bomb Wing Memorial.

· CONNECTICUT FIRE ACADEMY – Live Fire Demonstrations at 11:00 AM and 1:00 PM. Kid’s Fire Safety House, Vehicle Extrication Demonstrations and Flashy the robotic Fire Dog.

Since 1988, The Hole in the Wall Gang Camp has been fortunate to have the support of thousands of people. Each summer the camp provides love, hope and joy to over 900 children who are seriously ill with cancer, sickle cell anemia, HIV/AIDS, and other blood diseases. The Hole in the Wall Gang Camp also provides year-round programs for hundreds of children and their families – Free of Charge.


Directions from I-91

Take exit 40 (Bradley International Airport)
Take East Granby exit (RT 20)
Go right at the first light onto Bradley Park R.
Go right onto Nicholson Rd. to CT Air Guard
Go left at Air Guard onto Perimeter Rd.
At stop sign continue straight
Air Museum and Fire Academy will be on the left.

Shuttle buses run from parking areas to all venues

Main Parking Areas:
· New England Air Museum
· CT Fire Academy
· AGI Cargo Facility

Alternate Parking Areas: (on Bradley Park Rd.)
· Old Gas Turbine Building
· Eagle Global Logistics
· REM Sales

Just in case anyone is wondering, for the last week and until the end of the school year, I'm helping friends with an emergency childcare/transportation problem. I'm only home for a few hours each day and not doing much in the way of blogging.

Now, since people continue to send these questions to me in e-mails, I thought I would copy them from Subversity and respond publicly.

LAYER ONE

-- Name: Bernadette (aka Bernie)
-- Birth date: 5/17/1957
-- Birthplace: Bangor, ME
-- Current Location: Manchester, CT
-- Eye Color: Green
-- Hair Color: natural color - Dark Brown, current color - Red
-- Height: 5'6'
-- Righty or Lefty: Lefty (we're the only ones in our right minds!)
-- Zodiac Sign: Taurus (can't you tell? I'm full of Bull!)

LAYER TWO:

-- Your heritage: French, Irish, Swedish, Scottish
-- The shoes you wore today: black clogs
-- Your weakness: Food
-- Your fears: Snakes
-- Your perfect pizza: Double cheese, bacon, spinach, onion
-- Goal you'd like to achieve: financial freedom

LAYER THREE:

-- Your most overused phrase on IM: Cool
-- Your thoughts first waking up: COFFEE!!!!!
-- Your best physical feature: Eyes
-- Your most missed memory: I agree with Subversity on this - too personal to mention

LAYER FOUR:

-- Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi
-- McDonald's or Burger King: Burger King
-- Single or group dates: Single
-- Adidas or Nike: No way am I spending that kind of money on my big feet!! I go for the cheapest comfortable sneaker
-- Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: How about Maxwell House coffee?!?! Ok, if I have to drink tea I like Red Rose and I want my tea with MILK not lemon.
-- Chocolate or vanilla: Hagen Daas Chocolate Peanut Butter Swirl
-- Cappuccino or coffee: Maxwell House coffee

LAYER FIVE:

-- Smoke: yep.
-- Cuss: Sometimes
-- Sing: Yep - all the time
-- Take a shower everyday: I try to shower daily.
-- Do you think you've been in love: Yes
-- Want to go to college: Not sure
-- Like(d) high school: I hated high school!
-- Want to get married: Been there, done that
-- Believe in yourself: No - I have to prove things to myself before I believe.
-- Get motion sickness: no
-- Think you're attractive: No but I don't think I'm ugly either.
-- Think you're a health freak: Hell no!
-- Get along with your parent(s): Yes - if my Mom wasn't my mom, she would be a very close friend.
-- Like thunderstorms: I love them
-- Play an instrument: No but someday I would like to learn to play piano

LAYER SIX:
In the past month...

-- Drank alcohol: yep and I'll do it again today
-- Smoked: Daily
-- Done a drug: Nope
-- Made Out: Yes
-- Gone on a date: Not really what I would call a date
-- Gone to the mall?: No, I hate the mall. There are too many people.
-- Eaten an entire box of Oreos?: No
-- Eaten sushi: No and I won't try it either
-- Been on stage: Well we do call the open mic at Klekolo a "stage" but it's just where we stand to read poetry.
-- Been dumped: You need to have a relationship before you can be dumped so I'd have to say no.
-- Gone skating: It's been years since I've skated
-- Made homemade cookies: Do brownies count?
-- Gone skinny dipping: No :(
-- Dyed your hair: Definately!
-- Stolen anything: No!
-- You sound boring: Never boring - just bored

LAYER SEVEN
Ever...

-- Played a game that required removal of clothing: Yes
-- If so, was it mixed company: Yes
-- Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: Oh yeah
-- Been caught "doing something": A few times
-- Been called a tease: Only jokingly
-- Gotten beaten up: Emotionally yes, physically no
-- Shoplifted: No
-- Changed who you were to fit in: No - I'm the only person I know how to be.


LAYER EIGHT:

-- Age you hope to be married: I "was" married at age 29
-- Numbers and Names of Children: No kids, just cats
-- Describe your Dream Wedding: I've already done the big church wedding. If I ever get married again, I'd like to have a small ceremony on a cruise ship.
-- How do you want to die: Having a great orgasm!
-- Where you want to go to college: Is there a free one?
-- What do you want to be when you grow up: Inn owner/chef
-- What country would you most like to visit: England

LAYER NINE
In a guy/girl..

I'm leaving ALL of these blank because they simply do not matter to me!

-- Best eye color?
-- Best hair color?
-- Short or long hair:
-- Height:
-- Best weight:

LAYER TEN:

-- Number of drugs taken illegally: 1
-- Number of people I could trust with my life: I've been very fortunate in my life to have too many people to count, that I would trust with my life.
-- Number of CDs that I own: Maybe 30 CD's but hundreds of 45's and LP's
-- Number of piercings: None
-- Number of tattoos: One at the moment - Taz on my right shoulder blade
-- Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper?: just a guess I would say 3
-- Number of scars on my body: 5 that can be seen
-- Number of things in my past that I regret: only one regret, getting married

Last minute plans will have me running around, today, like a chicken with my head cut off! I was going to leaving Friday morning for Maine. My uncle is celebrating his 75th birthday this weekend. While conversing via e-mail last night, it sounds like my cousin, Vicki, can use a helping hand with the last minute details for the party. So, I'm going to leave Thursday.

It's been a few years since I last visited my relatives in Old Town. Hopefully I will have a chance to see the majority of them at the party on saturday. Of course I haven't a clue what to get my uncle for a gift. I'm not even certain I'll recognize him. My uncle quit smoking cigars!! I can't recall ever seeing him without a cigar stub in his hand or mouth. Vicki suggested something to do with the Red Sox, since Uncle Joe is a Boston fan.

I come from a large family and it's nice to have pictures to remember who is who. I'll be lugging along my camera to capture the family antics. When I say large family, we could populate a small country. On my Mother's side of the family, I have 65 FIRST cousins! I won't even attempt to count my cousins children!! Family gatherings are normally 150+ people for the day. These are just the ones that live in the area, not even full reunions. While I'm in Old Town, I'm going to try my best to get some pictures of the gathering. Unless you've been to Maine, with me, people have a hard time comprehending the size of this family!! At some point I'll have the pictures on my web page for everyone to view.

It's time I started running my race for today - clean the car, hair appointment, laundry, packing, bank run...... and of course a few Scrabble moves in between.

Video Voyeur Update:

How can anyone set up a video camera in THEIR bathroom in THEIR home and plead not guilty? Only two adults lived in the home - Ron and the roommates he video taped.


Accused voyeur pleads not guilty

NORWICH -- The Massachusetts man who allegedly used a hidden video camera to secretly film nude female roommates at his Colchester home pleaded not guilty in Norwich Superior Court Monday.

Ronald A. LaMontagne is charged with two counts of voyeurism and 20 counts of disseminating voyeuristic material, a felony. LaMontagne allegedly traded the images over the Internet and through the mail, police said.

Have you ever woken up with a song in your head that just won't go away?!! That's what is happening in my head today. The worst part is that I don't know the name of the song and I've never heard it played. You see, years ago, I used to square dance (stop laughing!). The song playing in my head, was one used for square dancing. The dance caller would take a song and incorporate square dance moves into the song. The lyrics I know, without the square dance moves are "Did you ever lie and listen to the rain fall? Did you ever eat a homemade apple pie? Did you ever hold a child while it was sleeping? Just don't the good life pass you by". I'm pretty certain this is a country/western song and would really love to hear the real song. So, if ANYONE knows the name of the song, who sang it, or anything about this song, please tell me!!!!

Several people have asked when I was going to respond to this weeks "We Have Brains" topic. Quite honestly I was going to, simply because everyone has a theory that can not be proven to be right or wrong. You can click on "We Have Brains" to read the full topic but it comes down to: "Is it nature or nurture that causes us to act like 'boy's or girl's".

I do not believe it can be determined how much of our “biological” sex is nature or nurture. Unless we can eliminate any and all references to gender when raising children, we will never know just what is nature or nurture.

How can you explain same sex children (boys or girls) being raised in the same home, same values, same education – yet as different as night and day? How would you explain identical twins, raised in different homes, by different parents, with different values – but identical in their choices for mates, jobs, values when they are adults?

We can theorize all we want, but there will be no way for us to prove our theories. You can only teach your values and beliefs to a child until a certain point. As the child grows they develop their own personalities, form their own likes, dislikes and values Sometimes based upon their upbringing, sometimes totally opposite. I don’t think anyone can say with certainty where the opposite values came into the child’s life.

Sing praises to the Goddess Persophone!

Heavens above -- you are an absolute goddess in bed! Your deeply sensual nature and sexual confidence drive men crazy with desire. Persephone, goddess of the night, is your inner deity and she guides your every move.

Take the God/Goddess test


Don't care about being a God/Goddess? How about the Ultimate IQ Test?
I scored 133!!

Congrats Colette!!!! She's graduating from PACE University today with a Bachelors in Computer Science.

I went to an auction yesterday, mostly to see a friend I haven't seen in a long time - Roger. He hasn't changed a bit, balding, opinionated, sexist, lovable old coot - I wouldn't change a thing about him. After the auction we went to Klekolo for coffee and to catch up on old times. While we were talking this guy walked by with a phone stuck in his ear. I commented about another one that was born with a birth defect - phone in his ear. Roger informed me that is the artist, Jason, whose sculptures are hanging on the wall inside Klekolo. What a coincidence!!! I had e-mailed him a few days prior because I want to purchase one of his pieces!! Well, I just had to follow him into Klekolo, being a polite person, I didn't interrupt his phone conversation - just followed him from spot to spot and back out the door. He finally realized he was being followed. I explained about being the person interested in the Lucien piece etc. and he had just put one in his van that morning! Anyway, I know own one of his sculptures and it will look great hanging on my wall!! Jason joined us for awhile outside talking and we found out he sets up a booth at most of the Ren Faires. He does King Richard's Faire in South Carver, MA as well and has offered me free passes to any of the faires - YIPPEE!!! At $22.00/pp for entrance, those are nice passes to have!
It's been a couple of years since I've been to King Richard's Faire but I'll be making a point to go this year. Even if it's just to see Jason :)

I guess the boat isn't going in the river today since I didn't get a call yesterday :( Its suppose to be a gorgeous day here - hi's around 75, sunny, nice breeze. You know, the kind of day you look forward to all winter long! This morning (what's left of it) will be spent running errands. This afternoon I'll soak up some rays, trying to eliminate the blinding white color of my legs.

I have survived another round of birthday celebrations!! That in and of itself is a major accomplishment. Determined to make the most of my birthday this year, I started celebrating friday afternoon at my favorite watering hole, J&G's. I spent most of the time chatting with a friend, Tommy and managed to get an invite onto his boat this monday. It's not a big boat and he'll launch it into the Connecticut River in the morning, head down river, and just "hang" for the day.

Satuday morning I was very rudely awaked about 5:00, to the sound of my smoke alarm chirping - NOT NICE! Knowing I didn't have a 9V battery here, I had to tolerate the chirp. These alarms are hardwired into our electrical system. Pulling the battery out won't stop the chirping. Luckily it stopped after a couple of hours. By then I was awake and grumpy. On my way back to J&G's for more celebrating, I picked up a new battery. I was NOT going to be awaken again by the chirping at an ungodly hour (wrong!). After too many free Margarita's I returned home about 11:00 last night and proceeded to attempt to change the battery. I spent about 15 minutes trying to remove the electrical connector so I could open the cover to the battery. Never thinking to get a screwdriver and pry it open, I surrendered in frustration. As you can probably guess, I was again woken this morning, about 5:30, by the not so quiet chirping. Tossing the pillow and blankets over my head did not muffle the sound. There were serious thoughts of ripping it out of the ceiling this morning. After my first cup of coffee, it finally occured to me --- screwdriver!! With that flash of brilliance (does happen sometimes) I proceeded to change the battery!! Now the smoke detector is hanging from it's electrical connection with a new battery. When my patience returns I'll try snapping the cover back into the plate.

I'm trying to decide how to spend today - quietly soaking up the suns rays while reading a book or attending an auction at The Buttonwood Tree. The proceeds from the auction will be going to the Connecticut Poetry Festival being held in September. The have one really cool item I'd love to have -- dinner and hot tub party for 4 people. Of course I would need to have 3 single men to help me really really really enjoy it!!! Do I have any volunteers?

Marianismo

What is it in our global culture that has the majority of women convinced that sacrifice and selflessness signify a morally sound woman? What do you think of the assumption that females, if mentally stable, are all willing to not only play the role of mother, but give up their own lives to do so, while men are never questioned about why they did not put their careers on hold around age 30 to start a family? I am sure exceptions to the rule exist, but what is important here is that these assumptions and expectations are the rule.

What I am asking is a loaded question: What is wrong when in a society, instead of encouraging cooperative childrearing, competition is promoted among moms to see who can, in the spirit of Marianismo, sacrifice the most? How do we change this narrowminded thinking?


Interesting topic for debate but one that really should not be debated. Quite simply put, until men can give birth, it will be the woman’s decision to have children. She is the one to make the final choice and sacrifice. She is the one that will gain weight, vomit, go through major hormone changes etc. For nine months her body will be the sole support for a new life, totally dependent upon her. Everything she does, eats, drinks will have an effect on that life. During that nine month period a bond of total dependency forms between a mother and child. If a mother chooses to breastfeed, the child is still dependent upon the mother’s body total nourishment. This is a bond men simply can not comprehend because they don’t live it. That’s not to say men don’t form a bond, they do, but it’s not quite the same bond.

When speaking of “cooperative child rearing” it can mean cooperation of both parents or daycare. While raising a child can be done by one (many singles do it and my compliments to them) it’s best to have two parents. Even if it’s just to have a “back up” to give one parent a break from the mental stress of the day. It’s my belief (and I’ll probably get slammed for this) one parent should be a stay at home parent. Raising a child is a full time job, one that should not be entrusted to strangers (day care). You are no longer instilling your values on the child when you hire someone else to raise them. I have no statistics to back up my opinions, but look back to the days when Mom stayed at home. The family was a “single unit” and not constantly running to do get it all done. There was quality time for everyone. Today, children tend to get lost in the shuffle because parents are too busy attempting to “do it all”.

It doesn’t HAVE to be the woman. Many men would be willing to be stay at home Dads, if they had the opportunity. The decision to be a stay at home parent is an economical decision. Can one parent afford to give up their job without giving up their living standards. If the “family” can get by with one paycheck, it’s usually the person making the least, that will stay home. In too many cases that is still the woman.

Months ago friends pointed me to a Yahoo Group called "Fly Lady Mentors". This group teaches you how to "organize your chores" so the task of completing them isn't overwhelming. I had started to "declutter" my home and get myself organized awhile back. I even loved the clean home. Then my proscrastinating self took over and kept saying "I'll do it tomorrow". Before I knew what was happening, I had fallen back into my same old routine of procasting until it HAD to be done. Well the clutter is back and the routine has fallen by the wayside. It's time to regroup and move my butt!

Surely I am not the only one that has a difficult time motivating myself? It usually takes me being completely disgusted with something for me to do something about it. How do you motivate youself before getting to the disgusted with the mess stage?

Today I'm in a motivated mood and have scrubbed down my kitchen - completely. I'm tired but I need to continue since these "cleaning modes" are few and far between. Having known myself, all my life, I know I won't do it tomorrow - therefore it MUST get done today.